And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
