You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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