just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
