That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
