Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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