Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
