i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
