Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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