you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
