I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
