I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
