Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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