new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
She needs sedatives and a leash
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I don't want my vagina anymore.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
