is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
