this beer tastes like vomit already
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
