We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
