i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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