Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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