Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Randomize
