I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
bring money and cleavage
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
