I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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