So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
