I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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