pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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