she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
