So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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