problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
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