I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
God, I missed his penis.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
