You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
