Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
