Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize