I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
