is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
