Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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