Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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