Your dad touched me again.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Found your dick twin last night
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
