I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Let's paint friendship bongs
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Sex in the backyard? Check.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
