a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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