you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
