did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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