the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
