Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
