Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
