We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
