My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize