I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
