I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
