I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
