For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
