so that wasnt chicken after all
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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