i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
