So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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