You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
