U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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